the darndest things

two of the favorite things i have said this year:

during winter retreat, while watching the cutting edge.
kids: "what are they doing?"
me: "well, they're doing tequila shots." (main characters are celebrating getting into the olympics)
kids: "why are they doing that?"
me: "the salt and the lime are suppsed to make it 'taste good.' let me put it this way... you could drink tequila, or you could just hit yourself in the head with a hammer a bunch of times and it would be about the same and it would be cheaper."*
kids look puzzled.

*seriously, this advice i wish i'd gotten. perhaps it would reframe the partying discussion if we just show what people look and feel like when they're hungover.


during new orleans mission trip, while painting.
kid: "when you get married, are we invited to your wedding?"
me, without missing a beat: "sure."
kid walks away.
site supervisor: "is that happening soon?"
me: "i'm not even dating anyone right now." laughs.
kid comes back: "is there going to be an open bar at your wedding?"
me, puzzled, but again without missing a beat: "well, i'm not sure, yet, we're still picking out the centerpieces."
kid: "ok." walks away.