family ties ... sha na na na

my middle brother eric is in the philippines right now with my dad. eric is between terms at his fake advertising portfolio school. it's really an advertising portfolio school; eric just calls it a fake school because it's kind of a two bit run operation. when i saw the place it reminded me of when i did yearbook - a bunch of kids in an artsy room with the air of lax supervision. he likes it though, and it seems to be bringing out the smart ass creative side in him.

i'm a bit jealous of eric getting to travel around. for one, the weather is probably pretty amazing (i.e. not cold and rainy as it is here). and more significantly, he's travelling to both the old hometowns of our parents. this is something i'd really like to do myself someday. it would definitely give me more insight and understanding for my parents and where i come from. it's one thing to hear my dad lecture me about that stuff (not effective) and quite another to see it in the flesh (far more effective).

ever read the color of water? it's by james mcbride, i believe. he wrote about his mom's life, and orthodox jewish woman who married an african american man in the 60s - not too common then. she ended up raising 8 or 9 kids herself. amazing story. the story is about her, but also about him and how the story affected him. good stuff.

i think it's kind of like that for me. no, i'm not half jewish, but i do feel divided between my parent's lives and my own life. i'm not bi-racial, but bi-cultural. i look filipino but i can't speak a lick of tagalog, save for the swear words my dad would utter when he'd drop something on his foot. i don't really know anything about filipino culture. but today my friend dan told me that i'm the most knowledgeable person on north american pop culture that he knew. i can talk that talk, quote simpsons lines, refer to obscure movies, answer trivia, and so on. i blend into that culture. but in so doing, i think i've negated where i come from and part of who i am. i feel a bit lost at times. it's been interesting to explore this a bit. know thyself, right?